Forgiveness changes things. In fact it changes everything. It changes the heart, soul; and life of the forgiver. There is a perception correct that occurs through forgiveness.
When you live in unforgiveness; you are able to see life from the one vantage point that you have- yours. With unforgiveness in and breeding in you ask yourself: how correct do you think the perceptions you have could be with something so negative living in you? Not sure? Well; then let’s add some of unforgiveness cousins for fun and see! How about a little resentment? Bitterness? Anger? Impatience? Are you starting to get the idea now?
I didn’t realize just how incorrect my perception of everything was. My perception of relationships, perception of my biological mother; and most important my relationship with Christ. My life was being lived based upon incorrect perceptions deeply rooted in unforgiveness. It wasn’t until I forgave that it was corrected. It wasn’t until I forgave that I was able to start living.
One of the biggest perception correction I experienced was regarding my biological mother. What I knew before I forgave her was that she told me she was going to get pizza and never returned. What I knew and remembered was that she didn’t show up to the final visit that we were scheduled to have with the social workers. My perception was that she abandoned me, didn’t want me and surely didn’t love me. My perception was that I was not worthy of love and therefore; unloveable. I lived a life based upon this incorrect perception.
How was this incorrect? Well; when you live in unforgiveness you are not able to see any other vantage point than yours. Once I became obedient to Christ and repented for my unforgiveness toward my mother and then forgave her for abandoning me I was able to listen to her. I was able to hear what she had to say and receive it. What did I receive? More than I ever could have imagined!
My biological mother shared with me that she never intended for me to be placed in foster care. She never intended to ‘not’ show up for the final appointment with the social worker! She went on to share with me that she was given an ultimatum by the social worker: sell me to him for 10k or never see me again. He was buying and selling babies on the Canadian Black Market. When she rejected his offer he changed the appointment time and because she didn’t drive; she couldn’t get there. She never saw me again. That was her side of the story.
For all those years I lived with the hate, resentment, fear of abandonment, forgiveness and many others based upon an incorrect perception! I made life decisions based upon all those things not knowing that they were not only incorrect; but were killing me. How about you? What do you think is behind the door of forgiveness that you have yet to open?
Once I listened to all of what my mother had to share; my life changed. I no longer had the resentment and hatred with deep-seeded unforgiveness breeding in me. My heart was changed. I no longer saw my mother as the fat, stupid degenerate that I always believed she was. (Just saying) No. Not any longer. I saw her as God sees her. I saw her as a woman who lost her child; a woman who suffered much. And a woman who against all odds chose life.
Forgiveness forever changed me. It brought me closer to Christ and it will too. It brought healing to every ounce of my being; including a change in my eye color and voice. It brought a change in perception. It brought humbling in ways unimaginable and it will for you too.
There is someone in your life right now waiting for his or her chance to share the truth with you. There is someone who is waiting to see you be free from what you have harbored deep within to this point. Are you ready to receive? Are you ready to forgive? I pray that you are as you are too valuable to waste away in the land of unforgiveness. I pray that you are ready to see with the 20/20 vision that God has been waiting for you to receive!