7 Things that Happens When You Don’t Forgive

You’ve probably heard it all; forgive. Forgive and forget. Forgive or you will go to hell; and on it goes. Sure we all know it. Forgive. Yes. We know. I’ve shared in the past what happens when you forgive; and let’s investigate what happens when you don’t forgive. Looking back to my life before I forgave I can testify much about the journey to help you move along.

When you don’t forgive:

1- You stunt your growth. Forgiveness is for those who wish to not only grow in Christ but within. When you choose to not forgive you are really just stunting your growth in every area of your life. Your relationships can’t grow, your relationship with Jesus stops; and you as a person can’t grow. There is no fruit bearing when you live in unforgiveness; just wiltedness overflowing to its slow miserable death.

2- You miss opportunities. God has a beautiful plan and purpose for your life and yet through unforgiveness you just end it all. There cannot be the opportunities that God intends because of your chosen disobedience to forgive. When you forgive who you are changes which means an expansion of territory and blessing; and in ways you can’t imagine. The choice to not forgive is simply denying anything good from coming your way. And what sense does that make?

3- Your health deteriorates. Unforgiveness eats your soul; and destroys the body. Related to unforgiveness is bitterness and it is spiritual poison that rots the bones. In the Story of Hannah she wanted a child yet was bitter. After she released her bitterness she became pregnant. Now this would make sense because how could someone with brittle bones carry a baby to term? Unforgiveness is also linked to arthritis according to a study by Harvard; although the Bible doesn’t really need Harvard’s proof but for those that like science; unforgiveness and the body being destroyed by it do go hand in hand. Other health issues related to unforgiveness are heart conditions, hypertension and others. For me personally when I forgave my eye color and my voice changed. It just testifies that if you live in the dark you will look like it!

4- Your level of self-absorbness and victim mentality increases. If you are alive you are probably a victim of something somewhere in life; just as much as you probably caused pain to another at some point. And? When you choose to live in unforgiveness you are only breeding your victim mentality that really everyone that is still around you wishes you would get over; they just don’t know how to tell you. So do yourself and everyone else a favor and forgive. It will help you get over yourself to see that Jesus already paid the price so you can quit making everyone else pay the price of just being around you. When I forgave my mother no longer was I focused on all the terrible things that happened because of her. My heart changed and it wasn’t any longer about what happened to me but what Christ did that set me free! You too will be able to see; and you will see that everyone else can be a victim too but that you will get further being a victor!

5- God can’t use you for what He initially intended. I knew God had a plan for me and I knew there was a call on my life from an early age; I just didn’t know I was the one in the way. Go figure! It was after I forgave that real opportunities came forward. Sure I had done plenty in my former ways and life although when God opens opportunities it’s entirely different. How else do you think I was able to be on The Today Show sharing the testimony of forgiveness in Christ? That wasn’t me! That was all Him and He wants to do big things in your life you just need to lay down the unforgiveness so He can move and you can groove; in Him!

6- You separate yourself from God. Unforgiveness is rebellion to God’s Word; period. It’s your choice to forgive and your choice to not forgive so pick one. Know that His Word tells us in Deuteronomy to forgive so that ‘you and your children may live’ so that’s something to think about. I didn’t know how far from God I really was. I played church and that that going every Sunday meant something; and boy was I shocked to learn how much of a pretender I was. Perhaps that is you. If you want to get closer to the Lord then ask Him to identify the areas of unforgiveness you need to deal with. Don’t rely on your own wisdom; since it’s probably the same amount that got you where you are in the first place. If you want to get closer to God then forgive. If not; then live in your mess but don’t blame Him! You were warned!

7- You die sooner. There is no way around this. You don’t forgive you die sooner than God intended. Not only that; you will die sooner in ways that you wouldn’t want to. They say time heals wounds but that is rubbish; forgiveness does. If it were true that time heals wounds there wouldn’t be so many old, angry bitter people in the world; who have just been living dead for decades. How much living will you truly be doing when you aren’t living the actual life He created you for?

See; you cannot live life dead. That is not living. You will only go through the motions and probably medicate yourself along the way and again; that is not living. Jesus came to set the captives free and to bring life in abundance and there really is life in abundance- you just have to get it. It’s there waiting for you!

You have everything within you to live the life God created. There is no doubt. He didn’t miss anything because He is perfect and He loves you. There is a life waiting for you and if you simply disregard this as what I hear so often,’I don’t have any forgiveness issues. There is just one person I can’t wait to see die’ or ‘I don’t have to forgive’ well then pray that God increases your self-awareness. You can be filled with wisdom and yet still self-unaware. King Solomon proved that! Don’t be so deceived to think that there is nothing you don’t have hidden in those places that can only be identified by the Holy Spirit; because that’s what I did. I truly didn’t believe I had any unforgiveness yet I actually displayed almost all 40 of the symptoms. So don’t do what I did. Take this to heart and be free so that your future that is waiting will come quicker than the journey from your past.

For more about forgiveness and walking out your purpose watch ‘Living in Forgiveness’ weeknights at 9:30pm CST on the UANetwork.

To have Julie speak at your church or business visit www.julieblair.com